Mindless Invalid
by theivorydealer
Summary: No plot, bad grammar, and poor spelling. It's Hogwarts totality gone insane! It's good old DracoHermione and Harry… Ron? Perhaps. Review and give me sugestions.
1. Chappie Uno

A/N: I can no longer keep up my other story because I was accused of plagiarizing, but you know I would never do that... So I'm writing this one! This story has a plot I promise but I'll add in the plot in like the next... ... ... 15 or so chapters.

Disclaimer: I own nothing besides this comfy straightjacket that the nice people at the asylum gave me.

Chapter 1: The insaneomatic

"Breathe in, Breath out..."

Hermione whispered her new mantra aloud. (A/N: I got that from a buddy's away message) She was warming up her brain before school.

"Feel your weight crushing the earth beneath you..."

Hermione shifted her weight around. She has been sitting in her cross-legged position for a very long time and she was starting to get cramps in her side and her left arm.

"See everyday as if it were your last..."

Hermione opened one eye. She started to hear voices outside the common room. This mantra, for some reason, really reminded her of Professor Trelawney, which she found disturbing.

"Let the people around you guide you in your journey through life"

Just then Harry and Ron burst into the common room in their underwear wearing capes and hats made out of old newspapers.

"Give me the polyjuice potion or see the end!" Ron yelled at Harry in a high pitched voice.

"NEVER!" Harry screamed back.

"Polyjuice potion?"

Hermione turned around. Harry was holding a small pink bottle in his hand. Hermione's long-term project for Professor McGonagall.

"Okay then," said "Ron I was going to get an F in McGonagall's class anyways."

"No problem" said Harry

"HARRY NO!" Hermione screamed but she was too late, Harry had already thrown the bottle onto the floor. The bottle was in pieces and the polyjuice potion was all over the floor.

Hermione could not control herself. She got up, walked over to Harry, and kicked him where it hurt. Harry clutched his injury and let out one word.

"Ouch."

Harry fell on the floor. Ron backed away slowly. Hermione cracked her knuckles and sat back down on the floor listening to her mantra.

A/N: Pure loveable crap. Hey, it's hard to write when you're in a straightjacket. Oh well, review and give me random suggestions for the next chapter! ; D


	2. Chaptar Duex

A/N: The last chapter, a bit weird I know. This story does have a plot I promise! Oh, and the more you review the faster I can update.

(Y)

(. .) -bunny

(")uu(")

Disclaimer: I own nobody, if you want to sue me you could only probably sue me for a piece of lint I found in my back pocket. Sifts around in straightjacket

Anywayz on with chapter 2!

Chapter 2: After Hours

The next day Hermione prepared a new potion for Transfiguration this would surely get full credit if not, she would be doomed to get an -A in her class. That, being the end of the world. Just then Ron came bursting into the common room singing "I Want to Hold Your Hand." (A/N: For all you Beetle lovers out there)

"What'ya do'in?" Ron asked Hermione looking over her shoulder.

"Redoing the project you and Harry ruined." Hermione answered in a cold tone.

"FYI, not my fault. Harry was the one who smashed your precious polyjuce potion in the first place." Said Ron rolling his eyes.

"Well, one of you stole the potion from my room." Hermione shot back.

"That's not all we stole!" Ron replied gleefully

Hermione took a closer look at Ron and noticed an enormous amount of her strawberry-mango glitter gel. Hermione screamed and yanked her hand back to slap Ron.

Before she could hit him, destroying the last of Ron's brain cells, Harry burst into the room and Hermione screamed again.

Harry was dressed in naught but Snape's dirty gray boxers (like in his worst memory, book 5) and Hermione's, blue and white polka dotted bra around his chest and her "sexy" red thong adorning his head. To add to his attire he grabbed a curtain off of the window, pulling down the curtain rod, and tied it around his neck. The curtain was quite heavy and choked him so he tucked a bit into Hermione's bra, where the cleavage would be.

Puckering up his lips he started singing "I Feel Pretty." Then he started to run around the room.

Like a bolt of lightning Hermione ran up to Harry and grabbed him by the neck and shook him violently.

"NEVER GO THROUGH MY STUFF AGAIN!"

Harry, being in his hyper/stupid mode could only say,

"Heh, I didn't know?"

Hermione kicked him again where it hurt, this time she kicked him harder because she had a very good reason to injure him. Ron ran out of the room.

A/N: Again, this chapter made no sense, actually Pearl's Pinky helped me write it. Now… REVIEW!


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